Friday, December 12, 2008

Admission

Back in August, Kevin and I talked about our project at a meeting of the Rockford chapter of the Hollistic Moms Network (http://home.homewebs.com/hmnrockfordil/). I talked about this meeting in an August post. Anyway, one of the chapter members asked if we ever cheated or had "cheater days" like she gave herself every 10 days when she was dieting. We truthfully and proudly said, "no, never!"

Well, we can't say that anymore. Sure, we've had some legitimate, by-the-rules meals out (work, travel, board meetings, etc.), but I also have to admit to a few moments of weakness or acquiescence to my wish for something instant or easy.

It started in September when Kevin was in Chicago on business for over a week. I had spent the first weekend in Chicago with my sister and family (Kevin was already working in another part of the city). That weekend I could legitimately eat non-local foods since I was away from home for an extended period of time. I returned home to my local foods on Sunday but by mid-week of 24-7 childcare duties (and the knowledge that Kevin was feasting on whatever he wanted), I decided to pick up a pizza one night (and of course there was enough for lunch the next day!).

Since that time, I've cheated once or twice a month, usually for the sake of convenience more than craving (although there is a little of that too!). It's pretty funny though, whenever I decide to cheat it's as if I'm on a covert operation, feel a little sheepish and guilty, and hope I won't see anyone I know. I did get caught by a friend a few weeks ago when I ran into a gas station for a caffienated beverage after filling my tank. She was very kind and didn't give me a hard time for my indescretion.

Neva also understands the concept (as she has been the recipient of some of the cheating). She will occassionally ask me if we can "go cheating" when we drive or walk past an ice cream or pizza shop. She understands that none of these places have anything we can buy but, just like us, she occassionally has cravings.

So, we've been very good... but not perfectly good. We do appreciate some of these "cheats" more than we previously would have. My mom baked brownies with walnuts to give to Kevin for his birthday and boy what a treat that was! Since chocolate is one of our exceptions (Kevin is our resident chocolholic) we have had that available to us but cookies/brownies made with honey are just not nearly as satisfying as those made with refined cane sugar (at least I haven't found the magic recipe yet) and the walnuts were a special treat too. -Thanks Mom!